Dilemma

As the dawn arrived, he felt torn deep inside.
he blinked, experiencing the moist in his eyes.
in his mind, from the thoughts of another sleepless night.
there he sat, watching the revelation of morning skies.

he dreamt about it again.
this time different.
this time with his sick step brother in his arms.
and his legs feel heavy again.

hopes of a mother,
willingly shared, willingly sacrificed.
feel the utmost responsibility,
to be the pillar of hope, the pillar of help.

in a state of uncertainty and perplexity,
requires him to make choices of equally unfavourable options.

one who risks nothing does nothing, has nothing, is nothing.
one may avoid sorrows and sufferings,
but never will learn, feel, change, grow or love.

dark ring encircle the body instrument used for sight.
frail is the body after days honing his skills.

yes Kindness is timeless,
love is indeed easy to give.
just be sure to whom it is being given,
for are they worth given?

talking on the phone for 1200 sec with one who gaves birth to her.
made him think proper,
is it worth the time and attention?
bothers till the Earth is affected.

haiz...

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Labels: even the sun goes down, heroes eventually die.

like this is the last time...

two more days to february 14th.
a day many enjoys company with their loved one.
the day this man is having 3 years of singlehood.

throughout being single,
meeting a few along the way happened,
unfortunately non was found yet.
life, indeed wasn't favourable, at all seriously.

yes many of you will say the time will come, i agree.
the process of it aint easy, nope not at all.

but along the way i met great people,
people who change my life, making me whoever i am right now.
and i would like to thank 'em for that.

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apart from that, Fuyo interschool went on great.
Ahmad, Shayen and Me manage to get to the top 4.
which for me is already a great superb achievement knowing that we went to compete together for the 1st time.
and i managed to get to the top 10 bboy list to go for the Seven2Smoke segment.
the other 9, Andreas, Syafiq, Charlie, Hazrul, Tappy, Kok, Erin, Jayden, Sabri...
all of em have way more experience than me, the underdog of em all.
all in all, i had a great experience battling tho i didnt get any points.
its what i like to call a sweet defeat.
know why? cause i lost to 9 other great bboys which for me was good!

but i observed throughout the comp,
many of the bboys do it from the head.
but not from the heart.
this was backed up by Funky Nas(EG) who brought about this topic.
theres really a difference of which he told me whether the bboy is doing it from the heart or from the head.

i had encouraging words from Mahmud as i was goin home together with him, Dian and Funky Nas.

its really inspiring knowing that it came from somebody whom you look up to, whom inspires you.

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throughout this year,
everything has been going on very smoothly.
everything seems to right suddenly, and i figured there must be something wrong.
no im not being negative.
its just that im too used to having a hard led life that i cannot adapt to this new environment easily.
everything has been going my way suddenly.
weird...

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dear grandma, its been 10 months that you've been gone.
sometimes, i would smell your scent anywhere.
you don't know how hurt i was when i kissed you for the last time.
i miss you deeply.
i wana share with you what has been happening lately.
i wana hear ur stories about the past again.
i just wish i could hear ur laughter one last time.

im not the asraf you used to know anymore,
he can no longer be independent, he cant cope with whatever's happening fast enough.
he's not the strong asraf you knew since young.
and when he fell, he would stay and cry now. when last time he'll be able to pick himself up and walk again.
in my dreams, whatsoever, i just wana see you for the last time.

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"you got to rock with the funk, if you wana have a good time."

Labels: let me take my time and reminisce